Little Cherubs or Little Monsters, everyone has their own view on whether having children at weddings is a good or bad plan. We gathered the views of brides and grooms who have made that decision and lived to tell the tale, and this is what they said...
Reasons for inviting the kids:
From believing a wedding should be a family affair, to wanting to ensure friends with children will be able to make it, here are some of the reasons some couples gave for including children on their wedding invite list:
" We wanted it to be a whole family celebration. We didn’t have children at the time, but plenty of our friends and family did. It really fed into where our reception would be."
" It’s nice to go to weddings as a kiddie. I didn’t want people not to be able to come because of it. It’s nice to have the choice as a parent."
" Not many friends at the time had kids. Those that did were very small and were travelling long distances to attend our wedding so couldn't leave them behind."
" We had our own children there and thought it would be nice for them to have friends there too (family friends). It was restricted invitation though."
" They are a part of our lives just as much as the adults. Children always bring fun & laughter."
" Our was a destination wedding so not fair to not open the invitation to those who wanted to tag on a family holiday. In reality people took it as break away from the kids so only those with small babies brought them."
" We had a child and we know many of our closest friends wpuld be more relaxed if their little ones were there. Some chose not to bring their kids but they had the choice. We wanted our younger family members to join our celebrations too! "
" They were integral to the event, and friends with young children may not have come if they weren’t invited. Anyway, who can have a wedding without little ones skidding around the dance floor?!"
" Family is family - mini human or not!"
Reasons for not inviting the kids:
And of those that chose not to invite children to their weddings, gave reasons from not wanting the risk of noise, wanting parents to relax, and because of number limitations as their top reasons:
" I didn’t want the noise during the ceremony and wanted all adults to enjoy themselves without worrying about looking after children."
" Wanting the parents to have a good time, partly budget too, being childless and clueless (although all our mates said they wanted a night off). It feels like an extra thing to organise..."
" Partly cost partly space - we’d have had to not invite some friends if we included everyone’s kids and we wanted to invite all our friends. Don’t think we’d have minded if we’d had space although think we were more of a view that it’s ‘our day’ so wanted to minimise risk of too much chaos!"
" It's a long day for children who become tired and irritable. It frees the parents from the worry. I've been to weddings in the past where children/babies misbehave or cry out in the middle of the ceremony which ruins that special moment and creates extra stress for the parents."
" Unfair to us and them. Weddings are adult occasions and we didn't want the day ruined by them, or for them to be bored by us!"
" I didn’t want the noise during the ceremony and wanted all adults to enjoy themselves without worrying about looking after children."
" We had a very tight limit on numbers so didn't invite children. One friend had a 6 week old baby who we said she could bring though."
" I (bride) didn't want any there, but was guilted by parents on both sides to include family kids... apparently they make the day."
What are your thoughts? Please share them in the comments to help other brides having the same dimenas.
And if you are planning a wedding, and thinking about inviting children, check out our hints and tips on keeping the kids happy (and quiet) during the day - starting with, of course, having a selection of our Children's Wedding Activity Books!